Wednesday, January 13, 2016

TOMMIE SAYLOR: The 'book' is often overruled by the heart


“A creative man is motivated by the desire to achieve, not by the desire to beat others.” 
Ayn Rand

By Tommie Saylor
Kennedy High School Principal

When you’re an educator and your dealing with students, it is often better not to go strictly by the book, but by the heart.

A student is sent to the office by an angry teacher, declaring that the student refuses to dress for physical education class.  When the instructor challenges the student about not dressing, the student becomes “lippy,” even disrespectful. By the book, the student is charged with insubordination and being disrespect to a staff member, and given a long-term suspension from school.

Judged by the heart, the administration discovers that the reason why the student is not dressing for PE is because the student’s family cannot afford gym shoes. In addition, the student does not want to be embarrassed by being the only person in class wearing socks – besides, all the student’s socks have holes. So, the administration gets the student a pair of gym shoes and the next day sends him back to class.

Sometimes the rulebook just doesn’t apply. It isn’t about being soft or losing control, it’s about being human. It’s about looking past the negative behavior and resolving the problem.  As I have stated before, student discipline isn’t about getting even, it’s about showing the students a better way to resolve a problem. It’s about taking advantage of a learning opportunity, it’s about helping a student to grow up and become a productive member of our society.

A student becomes upset, gets up from her desk and heads for the door.  The instructor tells her to have a seat, but ignoring the instructor, the student walks out the door and heads to the office to speak with her counselor.  The instructor, understandably angry, charges the student for insubordination, disrespect and leaving class without permission.

By the book, the student is charged with insubordination, being disrespectful and with leaving class without permission, and is given an extended suspension from school.

By the heart, the counselor discovers that the student became upset because the lesson of the day, and ensuing discussion, hit a little too close to home. It reminded the student of her parents impending separation. So, the counselor introduces the student to the social worker recommending services, and advocates for leniency with the administration.

Not everything is black and white. We live is a society mired in shades of gray.  Understanding a student’s pain and motivation behind the behavior is key to truly helping the student through the pain and modifying the behavior. 

Simply, Social Studies and English just doesn’t seem very important when the student feels that their life is falling apart. It’s at that point in time the schools resolve is to become the student’s safety net, the student’s safe harbor.

As Ronnie Dunn’s lyrics say, “We all bleed red, all taste rain, all fall down, lose our way.  We all say words we regret, we all cry tears, we all bleed red.”

Understanding, compassion and empathy are often the difference between a good educator and a world changer. 

Helping a student survive through a difficult situation and survive high school, truly changes their world.  Our legacy will not be written by the number of doctors, attorneys, or senators we help to create, but by how many worlds we touch along the way.

How and where will you lead them. Making Kennedy the school of choice. Excellence by design.

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